At first glace the card didn’t look that bad nor that good, but the title bout was enough to get everyone’s interest. Was it good was it bad? It was definitely good. Let’s go through it.

The first of the televised bouts was Kalib Starnes vs. Chris Leben.

Leben: best known for his highs and lows - mostly teary lows. Kalib: known for his lack of heart, and having sold over 100 million albums.

This was to be a battle of TUFers.

Nick Carter, Kalib Starnes, Aj Mclean, Brian Littrell, Kevin Richardson at the 2000 Grammy Awards

Will Leben get the big booshka? Is Kalib a sook who’ll tap at the first sign of stress?

Considering the big booshka to sook ratio I chose Leben to win by the booshka early in the first.

What happens when you put these 2 in a ring? A bit of a slop fest. Leben appeared a tad lethargic - a bit like a drunkard trying to land a KO blow, but Kalib was more crafty and stayed away from most of the big shots which seemed to frustrate Leben.

In the 3^rd Leben landed a corking shot to the liver that had Kalib stunned, but Leben failed to act on it as Kalib pulled out the jj sweep and on to the ground they went.

Close fight. Kalib got the decision. Leben seamed to disagree (fancy that). “Screw the judges, screw the scoring”.

What did we learn from this fight?

 

Leben likes to whine, but we already knew that. He was way too confident that he would be able to connect the big KO and when he couldn’t it didn’t look like he had a back up. Kalib actually showed some heart being cut in the first and taking the liver shot that’ll have him pissing red longer than a 3 day hooker binge would.

The second bout, Keith Jardine vs Whouston? Alexander

Will Keither Jardine KO him in the first minute or the second minute? Will anyone recognize Whouston? These were the big questions coming into this bout.

I picked Houston by KO, Why do such a thing you may ask? Well I like to gamble and at 450 I saw it as a good bet. WHY? Again you yell, well there was all this talk, Oh Whouston? 6-1 over 7 year’s wha wha he never fights! He hasn’t even been in a movie since 1993 and that movie sucked.

 

 

Well this is why, with a head like that you can tell two things. It can take hit, and it’s been hit. The torment from the other children as a youngster would have turned this man into a striking machine and he’s a single dad with 6 children… You know he needs the cash.Oh and that he stated he’s had over 200 fights in the last seven years. So at +450 he was the goer.

To sum this fight up, WOoOO! Sure, on paper it looked horrid, feeding Jardine this poor old single dad. With the 4:41 round 1 destruction of Forrest Griffin fresh(ish) in the memory from UFC 66 this wasn’t expected to last long. And it didn’t.

Round 1 begins and we’re all expecting Fist of Fury, and that’s exactly what we got, just the wrong man was connecting. Seconds in vicious upper cuts flew from Whouston? And you could feel the hits yelling “ITS FUCKING HOUSTON”. Jardine hit the ropes and one final booshka sent Jardines mouth piece flying and his head crashing to the canvas. Round 1, 0:48, TKO (Strikes).

Wowza, Whouston? threw down some heat and is on his way to sum cheddar! For his kid’s sandwiches and hell if he does it again he might even get himself some real cheddah! In a short night for Jardine at least we learnt that boys got a heap of heart, eating plenty of shots that would have put down a lesser man a lot quicker, (quicker then 48 seconds?!).

The third stanza, Terry Martin vs Ivan Salaverry

Next up in the third bout of the evening, Terry “the incredible shrinking man but not as incredible as Joe Riggs but at least I win” Martin vs Ivan “get the hell out but I guess you can come back for this fight” Salaverry.

This looked to be an interesting fight, Martin’s dropped down to middleweight from light heavy weight after being struck down by Jason Lambert at UFC 59 looked to be a good choice with his Shellacking of Jorge Rivera with a huge booshka leaving Rivera wondering what could have been only 14 seconds into the 1^st. Will the 5’8 nugget of power reap success again? Well they wouldn’t give him an easy fight as the Salaverry is no slacker, having a close lose to the number 1 contender Nathan Marquardt.

Considering the fighters histories I chose Salaverry based on his experience, if he could weather the storm he’d cruise by for a decision.

What we got was Terry Martin attempting slams and failing, while Salaverry was offering ’love tap’ leg kicks. This looked like it could be a long night… but before you know it Martins attempts at slams paid off and BOOM, he slammed Salaverry’s head into the mat and reigned down blows upon him as if his name was Ivan “I love” Slavery. Round 1. 2:04 TKO (Strikes).

At first glance the slam didn’t look that bad (says the man who almost teared up on kicking his toe as he went to sit down at his keyboard, but hey behind my keyboard I’m built like Bob Sapp, am hung like Lexington Steele, and look like Johnny Depp [Cause im a pirate.]) but after the fight Salaverry looked like he was transforming into Quasimodo all braced up, swelling, and scaring small children.

Martin does it again and the weight drops done him wonders, at 5’8 he was way to short for a light heavyweight, his still short for a middleweight but his power is defiantly going to cause some trouble! Salaverry looked disappointed and knowing the UFC we won’t get to see him again.

The fourth and co-mainevent feature, Karo Parisyan vs Josh Burkman.

This had all the makings of fight of the night, for the sheer fact it had Karo in it and his an entertainment machine, JUDDDOO THROW, up against the formidable Josh Burkman who’s definitely no slouch.

I don’t know what to think about Burkman but if Jeremy Horn spits on you, you must be an ass (Video 1). So I was going for Parisyan.

This fight was a back and forth with both fighters show casing their skill set, Karo looked more in control with the upper hand in the striking and some awesome JUDDDOO THROWs as per usual, a dominant decision win to Karo.

Karo looked great and his striking is really getting better will look forward to him getting a title shot soon? “I want my title shot” and I hope he gets it.

The Main event of the evening! Chuck Liddell vs Quinton Jackson.

Could the Iceman redeem himself against the Rampage that is Quinton Jackson? Having only one man left who’d gotten the better of him the Iceman would have his chance at total redemption? Will Jebus guide Rampage to the win? Or has all that religious mumbo jumbo pussafied the fire within? Or did Wanderlei brutally rip it out with his knees?

With talk both fighters were in the best condition of there life (a fighter saying that? outrageous) this was set to be a WAR.

On picking a winner it was fairly even spread, I myself picked the Rampage. Sure chucks stopped his last 7 opponents by KO or TKO only difference this time is that Rampage can throw a punch and eat one to, something chucks not use to. “Whoop his ass”!

Are you ready? Are you ready? Lets get it on!

Chuck hovers on the outside… Rampage cuts off the cage pressuring the Iceman, Iceman goes to the body (but where’s the combination?!) Rampage counters, SHAZAAM, right hand + jaw = Booshka. Liddell drops, Rampage showers him with strikes, Big John rightfully ends the bout. First Round, TKO, 1:53.

So QJ walks away a champion, more importantly for him he going to get himself some cheedah! And some sweet rims.

And as a bonus, he gets a shot at finally getting his hand on the Pride “Light heavyweight” belt against Dan “Cauliflower” Henderson. The most under-rated fighter in MMA is coming after Rampage this I want to see!